My Has-Been Life

Certain aspects of my life have a poignant "has-been" feel to them.  I reckon this is common in divorces-in-progress, especially if that limbo state lasts for any significant length of time. This has-been phenomenon casts itself over certain life areas, such as certain people, places, or even routines that are currently active and relevant, painting …

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The state of the (dis)union

It's been quiet around here, I know.  No news is good news, I know that too.  Yet, no news can also be bad news.  Or it could be backstabbing news, news that appears harmless but undermines you behind your back. There hasn't been too much action these days.  I keep half-expecting to see a metaphorical …

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I’m okay being single

There - I said it.  I never thought I would.  I'd always been the type to crave and desire love, the type that seeks out a new partner the millisecond a relationship is over. But let's face it, dear ones: after having been through (decades of) narcissistic and psychopathic abuse, I know that another relationship …

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I’m a person too

I've reached the stage (of what, I'm not exactly sure) where the relentless burning desire to investigate and discover has been replaced with a mere mild curiosity that only floats through my mind occasionally.  Thinking about my soon-to-be-ex and his daily activities is almost like checking Facebook; it's no longer a compulsion, but a purely …

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What a pathological narcissist / psychopath looks like on a dating website

I still sleuth, play detective, checking up on my soon-to-be-ex-husband.  This is important, because I still live under the same roof with him, and thus, his activities still have the potential to impact me. It's not that I like it.  It's not that I'm jealous.  It's not that I'm spiteful or vengeful.  It's not like …

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Uncomfortable parallels…

Anyone who has ever been involved with a narcissist or psychopath needs to see the true crime docuseries "Evil Lives Here".  Each episode presents a poignant account of a violent criminal through interwoven interview segments with someone who knew the perpetrator very well (typically a relative or ex-partner) and staged reenactments that visually demonstrate what …

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All I ever needed to know I learned from living with a psychopath

They should really teach personality disorders in school.  Narcissism and psychopathy especially, should be taught in the basic curriculum, perhaps nestled into the Life Skills classes that teach you about balancing your checkbook or renting your first apartment.  Maybe a standalone unit of the class, called How To Recognize and Avoid a Narcissist or Psychopath, …

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